Good News!!!

we made up yesterday. yeah!!! freaking finally. i told him a little bit of what i typed the other night and he said he would try so that is good. that's all i was asking for. most of the time he does but once in awhile he does something that makes my insecurities flare up and this weekend it was like thats all that was going on. on my part too i am sure. but we had some really great makeup sex too. it was awesome. i am just so relieved that we arent fighting any more. that sucked so much. and i think we both agreed that i was only going to stay for the actual weekends from now on. that way we both can get back to eating right cuz we just pig out together, so i can actually look for and find a job, so i can start going to school, and so we both dont loose perspective on the relationship. i started taking xanadrine or how ever it's spelled to try and jump start losing weight and get more energy and hopefully be able to fit into a bikini by the summer. i mean i am going to wear one anyway i at least would like to look good. went shopping yesterday. got alot of new panties. i love getting new panties. with everything else i got it seems that i spent a ton of money and barely got anything but i guess i did pretty good. i will do better on sunday when marisa and i go to old navy and h&m. i have to return a couple of things anyway that i got yesterday. but i am not going to put it in my register that i returned them so i will fool myself into thinking i have less money in there. trust me i can fool myself so easily, except when it comes to exercise and that stuff. well then i talk myself out of it. Keith said his ex and her mom took xanadrine and lost a ton of weight so i am hoping that it works for me too. right at this moment my life is pretty good. no bills, not fighting, not 60lbs overweight, got friends, (not necessarily in that order) i got it pretty good right now. just got to keep it that way. well i am hungry and i want to get some breakfast. hmmm i think i want fishsticks and macaroni and cheese for lunch. well it's better than the greasy pizza in the fridge. these pills are supposed to give you more energy in a half hour. hmmmm. i dont know about that. but i was really tired when i got up. so they may be working.