Walked home w/ John again tonight. We barely get to walk home together. It makes the train ride so much shorter. He always asks such good questions, I got him tonight though. lol. cuz I was thinking up things to ask for the last week or so. lol. I was really glad I thought up some good questions for him to answer. I was telling him how me and Keith would punch each other in the arm or leg. He thought that was messed up I think. Oh well. Now I am kinda sad. I want someone to punch me. lol. God I have been seeing a psychologist how long? and I am still this fucked up. lol. Actually ya know what I liked best about it, I knew Keith wasn't punching me nearly as hard as he could, but it still felt very solid. I was impressed. I know I'm a freak. I really want to be held by a big, strong, solid guy. *sniff* Not that Keith held me that much, but once in awhile I got lucky. aww now I'm really sad. lol. dammit. Alright I have to sleep now.