i am going to have to ask keith how he got to the point where it just didnt matter if he has sex or not. i mean is it just his age or what, cuz it's getting worse. i hate sex today. and men. well i dont hate them they just suck. for no other reason than it's gonna be awhile until i get some. and i want a boyfriend but that aint gonna happen. at least as long as i want keith to be that boyfriend. i think the weather is starting to depress me too. i am pretty gloomy today. seriously though if i take care of it myself i just want it more. i need to return those books so i quit thinking about it. or at least only read them on the weekends when i can put what i learn into practice.