why is it that when you are first with someone sitting on the phone not saying anything is romantic but sooner or later it gets annoying?

maybe that is a form of self preservation. ya know. so you dont lose your job cuz you are constantly on the phone with your boyfriend not saying anything. who knows. right now we are fighting. isnt that terrific? all cuz i was crabby yesterday and took it out on him so he is still mad about it. i swear i think he is taking out everything his ex ever did to him on me. he says that he is not jealous of kenny but he asked if had sex the last time he came over. whatever. but anyway. i cant wait to get a job. i have a new reason now. if i get a job then i can afford to do other things. like go back to tango and maybe take a hip hop class so i can learn to dance at clubs or whatever and that way i wont put so much emphasis on keith cuz thats what i did with my ex and look how that turned out. and i want to be able to have better perspective on everything and know that it doesnt have to work out and that if it doesnt my life wont fall apart and if it doesnt i will have stuff to occupy my time with instead of jumping into the dating pool again so soon. and that way i wont be so accesible to keith so maybe he wont take me for granted. not that he does. but ya never know when he might start. i cant wait till my stomach is used to eating smaller amounts of food again that way i wont be hungry and i can go down to the mid and lowest points in my range instead of the high and mid. but that probably shouldnt be until i loose at least 5 lbs but maybe ten because i dont want to be stuck not losing weight when i get down to 135 130 and i cant lower my points to start losing again. cuz then i would have to exercise more and that just aint right. lol. well anyway. i am going to start some laundry and read my book and then have some lunch. oh yeah sounds good.