well i was really looking forward to seeing keith today, missed him a lot, it kinda felt like that first night he picked me up after me and kenny broke up, but that all changed, we got in a huge fight cuz he didnt want to drive all the way here to pick me up so i said i would take the train, well before i said that i said i didnt really feel like taking it but then i looked it up and saw there was one for later, that i could make if i started to get ready right then well keith waited like 20 minutes to return the im but i still could have made it if i just left, well instead of answering about getting on the train, he just said i will come down tomorrow, well that really hurt my feelings that we had plans and he just blew me off, so i got mad, and we started fighting, well then one thing led to another and we broke up, i dont know if it is for good but i have a feeling it is, it has been seeming like he met someone else anyway, so i dont know. i was believing him that it was just stress and shit that was making him act funny but we hadnt been fighting for 2 weeks and i offered to stay longer last weekend and he didnt want me to and this is the second time he has not wanted to come down on friday and considering i said i would take the train, i hate how guys pull this shit, if you dont want to go out then just fucking say it, kyle was the same way he wouldnt tell me why, he didnt say i met someone else, if he would have then fine, but that's fucking mean to not tell someone why you are breakng up or give them a bullshit excuse that they know is fake cuz you cant lie worth a damn, and with keith he was saying how he hoped we could be friends no matter which way this went, because it's not going good, when 2 weeks is the longest we have ever gone without fighting, so obviously there had to be another reason for it. ya know he tells me to be open and honest well i hate not knowing where i fucking stand with someone, he says one thing and then does another, and i know actions speak louder than words but then when i call him on it he always has a reason for doing it and i try to give him the benefit of the doubt because he is always saying how honest he is, but ya know he isnt honest with matt, ya know i can tell there is something going on and he's not telling me and that is ridiculous considering i have to tell him everything, even to why i am smiling if i happen to be in a good mood. i thought we were doing good.